


Not right now

by Vampiricalthorns



Series: Tumblr Requests [3]
Category: Percy Jackson and the Olympians & Related Fandoms - All Media Types, Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rick Riordan, The Heroes of Olympus - Rick Riordan
Genre: Fluff, Genderfluid!Nico, Light Angst, M/M, Other, Trans!Will
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-23
Updated: 2017-06-23
Packaged: 2018-11-17 23:54:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,187
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11279397
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Vampiricalthorns/pseuds/Vampiricalthorns
Summary: It's been months since Nico's last gender change and he had started to forget what it felt like. He's been feeling different all day but doesn't realise it before Chiron's suggestion for the night's Capture the Flag.





	Not right now

Something just didn’t feel right. Nico couldn’t really pinpoint what the feeling. He had felt like this a couple times, like some of the days on the Argo II, but there he had brushed it off as his body just getting used to the normal world again after being stuck in literal hell and then an oversized cookie jar. But now the feeling was back, and there was no reason for it to be adjusting to the normal world again. Sure, he knew what the feeling of sometimes being out of time felt like. He was used to that and had talked to Hazel about it. But this feeling was entirely different.

 

He looked in the mirror, running his fingers through his newly cut hair. Maybe that was it. Maybe he just hadn’t gotten used to his changed appearance yet. After all, his hair had been an uneven mess for almost four years and now he had cut it. Of course that would cause some getting used to- or would it? Nico had never heard of anyone ever spending more than a couple hours getting used to a new hairstyle.

 

“Nico? It’s time for dinner.”

 

Will, Nico’s boyfriend, poked his head through the door. “What are you doing?”

 

Nico turned around and let a small smile tug at his lips. “Nothing. Let’s just go to dinner. I’m starving.”

 

In reality, Nico wasn’t, but that wasn’t something Will needed to know. In reality, Nico knew he had felt this feeling several times - even after he started dating Will. He hadn’t felt it for months and he really wanted to figure out what it was and what it meant.

 

Will took Nico’s hand and they started to walk towards the dining pavilion. The whole time Nico was quiet and in deep thought. Will looked down at his boyfriend again. It was common for Nico to go quiet sometimes, but if there was something on his mind that would trouble him for a longer time, Will would prefer that Nico opened up to him.

 

“There’s a capture the flag after dinner today,” Will said to Nico, trying to strike up a conversation with him.

 

“That sounds nice,” Nico mumbled, not looking up from his plate of pasta. “Does that mean you’ll have to work late tonight?”

 

“Probably,” Will admitted. “We’ll see how bloody it gets. I know three new Ares kids have arrived since the last time we played capture the flag. So it might get violent. Think you can help out in the infirmary as long as you don’t get a bad injury? We could really need the extra help after this game, I can imagine.”

 

“Mhm yeah sure, why not.”

 

Will frowned slightly. Nico was never this quiet anymore, even after a nightmare. Maybe he had talked to Reyna earlier about some stuff with the Senate in New Rome being idiots again. Last time that had happened…

 

—

 

“Can everybody keep quiet for a moment?”

 

Everybody turned silent as they looked at Chiron as started to speak.

 

“As we all know, we are going to play a new game of Capture the Flag tonight. The Apollo cabin will not be participating because of obvious reasons. I have a big reason to believe to this game will be rather bloody. We have gotten a lot of campers the last several weeks, so those who have a new member of their cabin, explain the rules to them. No serious maiming is allowed. And also, after a request from someone, we will be playing girls against the boys today.”

 

Nico froze and suddenly his mind went highway speed to process all the information. He didn’t know which team to be on. He didn’t feel like a boy today. But he didn’t feel like a girl either. So where did he fit in? It had been months since his gender had last switched. He was mostly a boy. But now? He was neither. How could he have forgotten that feeling? He was such an idiot. What had he done the last time he felt like this? He had hidden away, Will had talked to him and they had gone to buy him a dress. And that was great for the days he felt like a girl. But right now he didn’t. So where did he fit in?

 

“Nico? Are you okay?”

 

Will’s voice broke through his train of thought and he looked up. “I’m fine. Just got dizzy for a moment. I- I think I’ll go back to my cabin and take a nap or something.

 

He could feel the camp look at him as he walked out of the pavilion, starting to run once he felt he was far enough away from their judging stares. He needed a break. Why would Chiron even suggest such a stupid thing? Girls vs boys? They were a Greek Mythology camp for Hades’ sake. Of course there would be people that didn’t fit the binary of girl/boy. Even if it was mostly the Apollo cabin and the kids of Underworld gods that got affected by the different genders (Apollo was obvious, Underworld gods because how can you gender something that isn’t really alive?) it didn’t mean that no one else felt it.

 

He threw the door to his cabin open and sat down on his bed. Why did he even think of himself with male pronouns right now? He felt lost, like dust in the sunlight. Something that was there, but couldn’t be touched or changed. Because no one could change his gender. Hopefully, Will had understood what had gotten Nico to run away like that.

 

He felt alone and trapped. Maybe he should call Reyna. She was always good for calming him down and mainly just a good distraction from his mind.

 

Before he could get up and find a drachma to actually call the Daughter of Bellona, Will burst through the door. “Nico, are you okay? The pavilion is in a turmoil right now. Some people got really angry at Chiron’s decision for Capture the Flag tonight.”

 

Nico looked at Will. “How could Chiron even suggest something like that. H-How unfair isn’t that? Taking all the cis people on two teams and make them have a game. But what about us outcasts that don’t identify as the gender we were assigned at birth all the time? What about us. W-What about me?”

 

A second later, Will’s arms were wrapped tightly around him and Nico was hugging him back. “I didn’t recognise the feeling earlier. It’s been months since the last noticeable gender change. So when it happened today, I didn’t know how to deal with it. Not how to recognise it for that matter. I wish I figured it out earlier.”

 

“You don’t have to figure out anything. Not right now. Gender is confusing.”

 

“Mhmm yeah I know.” Nico rested his - their head against Will’s bound chest. “Not right now. Later.”

 

“Are you ready to face the chaos on the pavilion again?” Will asked gently.

 

Nico thought for a moment. “Yeah sure, why not? I would like to see how it plays out.”

**Author's Note:**

> Come find me on Tumblr: https://winglessvampire.tumblr.com/


End file.
